So, as you can probably tell from my lack of posts, I fell off the wagon. Not only did I fall off, it then ran me over repeatedly and then caught fire before taking off into the distance.
In other words, my mental health took a dive and I just couldn’t focus on anything other than surviving. My guess is that I was trying to be too strict with my ‘diet’ which lead to feeling deprived. That always leads to a binge, and then we start down the slippery slope of disordered eating, self loathing and, eventually, suicidal ideation.
Which leads to today. Almost a month since my last post. I’ve alternated between not eating at all, or binging on crap. So I sincerely doubt I’ve made much progress (and if my measurements have gone down, I’m aware that its not a ‘healthy’ weightloss).
I think that carnivore is off the table for now. As is ketovore. My mental health is too important to risk it. It’s something I’ve always struggled with, so you’d think I’d be used to it by now. But apparently not. I’ll try to stick to a low carb/keto way of eating, but until I’m more stable, I’m not going to panic if I have a higher carb day.
Anyway, today is a chore day, so laundry, food shopping and a general clean up of the van. Need to start going for walks again, I’ve barely left the van in the last month, and this is supposed to be a hiking page…
Thank you to everyone following along. I hope you all have a lovely day.
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